B: I told Debbi the Dong story from yesterday. Bailey overheard me saying the story, and saw us laughing about it, so he asked me to tell it again. I did, but I changed “dong” to “dog.”
T: So you were discussing my awesome dog?
B: Yes
T: Awesome.
B: I didn’t want him retelling a story at kindergarten about Tom’s Awesome Dong.
B: How are you dong?
B: Whoops, I meant “Doing.” How are you doing? I don’t call you Dong to your face.
T: My dong is awesome.
B: You mean awesome, like it’s doing really well right now, or it is generally awesome, as in it would be considered an awesome dong?
T: Well when prompted my dong replies, “Awesome.”
B: Wait, your dong can talk? That IS awesome. What else can it say?
T: It says, “bla bla bla bla bla.” Have you seen those commercials for the Tide Stick where the dude is in an interview but the stain on his shirt is mumbling?
B: Yeah, those are great!
T: That makes me laugh all the time.
B: Yeah, me too.
T: That is what my dong does.
B: Has it ever introduced you to a stranger?